Aden, you have a true talent - I would like to offer you the notion that changing from caterpillar to butterfly cannot ever be an easy experience, but the end result is always quite beautiful. Don't worry about going backward, find the strength to ride this through and go forward - I am going to copy here a piece of an article I just did about an extraordinary artist, and hope it encourages you and helps you transform your relationship with your self and this difficult passage, which you so eloquently capture in this truly expressive Expression!
'Surrounded by the contrast of the exquisite beauty of her birthplace - the towering mountains, blowing green leaves of the sugarcane fields and sparkling blue skies – and the desperate urgencies of survival in the midst of intense political and governmental turmoil, with the military coming to power and overthrowing the existing democracy, Maria’s childhood environment was fraught with extreme poverty, hardship, violence and despair.
The stark disparities that filled her every day with such incredible beauty and joy, and such ghastly horror and terror, are exactly what nurtured the seeds in the garden of her soul and produced the great, versatile artist that she is – as is the case with so many of the incredible talents the world has produced throughout the centuries.
It is as if those of us who grow up in such a cauldron of extremes are given a mandate, a manifest destiny, to express our grief, pain, love, joy – all our passion - through multiple creative media, just to stay sane and to connect with our fellow human beings and our planet at a visceral level, thus demonstrating the incredibly healing power of art in all its myriad forms.'